Today is a good day.

I titled this post on 1/16 but didn't have the nerve to publish it until today. On Wednesday, after 6 months of trying to get pregnant, I peed on a stick and got the 4th BFP of my life. I could barely believe it! T. was on his way out the door for work and I yelled, "T! Come here!" and he yelled back, "But my ride is here." And I said, "I think you want to come here." He came running up the stairs and I showed him the two tests and he looked at me in disbelief and followed up with a kiss.

I called my doctor that morning and they set me up for blood work. During lunch I ran to the lab and by 3:15p I had the results - HCG of 372 and Progesterone of 23.9 and instructions to repeat the labs on Friday. It seemed like forever but finally Friday came and I once again went for blood work at lunch. I waited an agonizing hour and a half before I called for results. It isn't hard to believe that they weren't ready. I left my number and told them to leave a message. Of course that afternoon we were holding interviews for the SDP position. I could barely concentrate on the interview wondering if the results were in. When the interview as over I walked briskly to my office and grabbed my phone. Yes! There was a voice mail waiting!

With trepidation and excitement I listened to the message and the nurse said, "Your numbers went up beautifully!" Relief! My HCG had gone from 372 to 875 - more than doubling in the 48 hours. My progesterone was up as well. This was good news! My first ultrasound is scheduled for the 24th, the same day as our meeting with the adoption counselor.

I am happy and excited. I feel differently this time, not to say that there still isn't worry and anxiety that something could go wrong. I still check the t.p. every time I go to the bathroom and any little twinge I feel makes me wonder what might be going on. It is early, I am only 4w3d today. But today I am pregnant and I love my little cluster of cells. Who knows what tomorrow might bring but I am happy today.  T. is a bit more reserved but I can tell he is excited too. Today he asked when we can start discussing names.

Today is a good day.

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